Aimless Wandering

So you put on your resume that you’re an experienced web designer.  You even own a music sales website that you claim to have designed.

In preparation for the work that you were supposed to be doing on our website you were told at least 5 times by several people not to work on the live version of the site.  You were told repeatedly that a development server existed for you to design your pages on and test them out before you implemented your changes on the live site.

So off you went to go work on updating and redesigning the website.  Not surprisingly, after looking at the underlying code on the page you discovered that the design is fairly amateurish at best and decided to work to update the templates used.

On the plus side, you created a CSS template to standardize the design and layout of our webpages…

What you didn’t do - was create that template on the development server!  Knowing that our webpages as originally designed DIDN’T conform to any real design standard, you should have realized that the pages were going to act somewhat unpredictably when you applied that CSS template to them.  That happens to be exactly why we told you to work on the friggin development server!!!!

Even worse was that you didn’t even bother to go through the site to see what happened after you had applied the CSS template.  So you had no idea that the template had screwed up several pages.

Then you ran in to a problem as you were working on a page so you contacted the server administrator for help.  When the server administrator discovered that you were doing development work on a production server  he told you to stop - your response was to argue with him that you were just creating CSS sheets and editing HTML and not writing scripts!

Then when OUR boss confronted you - you got rude and actually yelled at him!  YOU were wrong.  YOU ignored what you were told, YOU were the one who broke the pages.

When you were asked why you deliberately ignored what you were told you came up with ridiculous excuses.   First you told us you didn’t have access to the correct network - you were reminded that wasn’t true.  Then you told us that you couldn’t work on the laptop you were issued because the display was too small and you couldn’t read it.  Then we reminded you that you could use one of the monitors that was at the desk you were working at…

Then you tell us that you don’t understand what the development server would do because you don’t understand how that would help you - even though you can’t remember what the page looked like before you screwed it up!  Then you gave me a blank look when I explained that if you screwed up the page on the development server, what was on the public server would be untouched - and you could compare the two SIDE BY SIDE AND SEE WHAT THE CHANGES WERE!

The bottom line though.  This is just one more reason why I have absolutely NO CONFIDENCE in your abilities - real or claimed on your resume - and if I had any control over the situation, I’d fire your ass already…

I type this post while sitting at the Seattle-Tacoma International Airport at the end of a 10 day trip that has taken me cross-country (twice), Trans-Atlantic (twice), under the English Channel, to 3 countries, 2 continents, and ridden on 3 planes, 1 ship, 2 taxis, 1 bus, 1 train, a crazy van, a river barge, and countless subway trains… It’s been one heck of a trip! Some what follows is my usual rambling notes from the experience-

• So I decide to try out an “off-airport” parking lot this trip. Their normal rates are actually more expensive than the airport lots, however this place bombards us with coupons which make them very reasonable so I decide to try them out. I then spend a half hour circling their garage trying to find a spot and end up giving up in frustration. I stop at the exit to ask if there are any spaces – Nope, but they would be happy to valet my car AND NOT offer me a discount! Amazingly enough, I didn’t have a problem getting a spot at the airport’s garage….
• Ever heard of Song? It was Delta’s attempt to compete with JetBlue, it didn’t do so well and as a result the planes that used to fly for Song are now back in service with Delta, however many of them still have the Song markings on the outside. The plane I flew from San Francisco to New York was just one of those planes… As we taxied around JFK after landing we passed a parked jet with Song markings. Heard from the seat behind me “Ooooh Song, I’ve never seen them before and wonder who flies them?”
• Speaking of JFK, my flight landed 15 minutes early, but we got to the gate right on time – why? Because we missed our turn to the terminal. Yes, we had to circle around because we couldn’t take the turn we needed – there was a plane in the alleyway we were supposed to go down.
• Also speaking of JFK, as cramped and difficult that airport can be, I really like it. I’ve always found the old TWA terminal (soon to be part of the JetBlue Terminal) and the old PanAm (now Delta) terminal to be really cool looking. Plus lots of airlines go there and I like looking at the unique paint schemes… Aeroflot’s silver scheme with the Russian flag draped on the tail is quite cool…
• So if you have a balance problem or a hip problem and as a result need a cane to help you when you walk…. is it really a good idea for you to be wearing heels… on a ship!!!!
• Yo!Sushi= Too cool for words. The website doesn’t give you a real idea of this place. But in a nutshell you sit at a “bar” which has a conveyer belt imbedded in it. Various sushi rolls, tempura, rice, salad, and soups make their way around the belt. See something you like – just pluck it off the belt. The color of the plate determines the price of the item. Everything is made fresh right in front of you and nothing is on the belt for more than two hours. Plus you can order hot foods and items that aren’t on the belt. These are cooked fresh right in front of you too.
• Eurostar = freakin’ awesome! What a ride- 200+ MPH and very smooth. Traveling the train in the US can be very jarring, the rails just aren’t very smooth so there’s lots of bouncing and rocking. Not on Eurostar. Your ears may pop in some of the tunnels though. Plus in the US it’s pretty common for trains to be late – very late, like 4 to 6 hours late. We were 10 minutes late, and the staff was extremely apologetic about the delay. In addition, the service was just outstanding.
• Given the reputation that the French have of being “cheese loving surrender monkeys” (according to Jeremy Clarkson) just whose military victories does the Arc de Triumph celebrate?
• Possible failed French defensive strategy- Putting circular staircases in lots of buildings and the deep Metro stations. The thought being that if the climb itself didn’t kill off a few people, the circular staircase might make them get dizzy lose their balance and fall down the steps and break their neck…The Arc de Triumph is 264 circular steps up – with a matching set for the trip down.

• Speaking of steps, we’ve decided that Montmartre is a French synonym for “up stairs”

• As we wondered through Montmartre there were parts of it that felt like they could have come right from the France area at EPCOT in Orlando. Quickly followed by the realization that there were really parts of the France area at EPCOT that could have come right from Montmartre (just without the steps!).
• Paris is a truly unique city – it’s the only place I’ve been where there was a designeresque shoe store IN a subway station!
• Paris was hosting the Rugby World Cup while we were there has setup huge video screens by the Eiffel Tower where visitors could watch the games, and lots of people gathered there. So there were porta-potties in place to accommodate the visitors… Part of those accommodations were open air urinals… No screens, nothin’ guys could walk up and relive themselves right out in the open.
• For a town that is so style conscious (and that stereotype of Parisians is definitely true) Parisians seem to be attracted to some seriously butt ugly cars.

• I’ve always heard that Parisian’s are crazy drivers – and from watching them zip around I can definitely see where they have gotten that reputation. But here’s the thing – very few cars had any kind of damage on them. With darting and weaving that was going on, you would expect that quite a few cars would be sporting some battle damage. The majority of cars however were just dirty…
• I had always heard that Parisians tended to be pretty rude and surly, and as a result we were bracing ourselves for the worst. What we experienced however was the opposite. While I would hardly call them “friendly,” never once were we made to feel unwelcome. As we wandered about looking for a store (that we found out had moved) a French woman actually stopped (without being asked) and pointed us in the right direction. Granted it didn’t stop us from circling the same massive church three times – but still… Plus, while we never did or wore anything that screamed out that we were Americans (although it was probably obvious we were tourists) most places we went to folks would either start speaking to us in English or switch to English without being asked. Even when we tried to speak with our crummy French folks didn’t seem to be upset with conversing with us in English.
• In France it is apparently acceptable (or at least not unusual) to hold up a line because you are sending a text message on your mobile phone.
• It’s also apparently acceptable to have a conversation on your mobile phone while riding on a Metro train or dining at a café. This might be because unlike in the US, the French don’t appear to have the same tendency to yell into their phones.

So I was paying bills last month and in perusing our credit card bill from a nameless three lettered credit card providing company I discovered that they had decided to raise our interest rate - A LOT.

This card more than any other that we have does nothing for us. There’s no benefit to having it other than that it exists… So I decide to dig into our savings and pay it off and close it out that way we don’t have to pay them a crazy high interest rate for no reason. Fine right?

Except that the very day after I discover that they jacked up my interest rate I get a letter from nameless three letter credit card providing company stating: “Congratulations! Due to your stellar credit history we’re raising your credit limit by $8k!” Come again? First you raise my interest rate a lot, like 5% a lot, then you DOUBLE my credit limit?!?! WTF!

But that’s not all… Oh no, first I pay off the balance on the card and wait for the payment to clear. Then I call them up to close the account. After telling rep #1 twice to close the account I’m transferred to another representative; this one in the recovery department or whatever the heck they call it. Rep #2 wasn’t going to take no for an answer - heck he didn’t want to take “CLOSE MY ACCOUNT” for an answer either. He offered low balance transfers, super low teaser rates, and even was willing to lower my interest rate by 6%, he might have even said that I was making his puppy sad, and that by closing my account little orphans in East Kersplakistan were going to starve….

After telling rep #2 to “CLOSE MY ACCOUNT” for the 10th time, I decided to add the extra prod: “Look pal, just quit wasting both of our time with these games, abandon your script because there’s nothing you are going to offer me that isn’t going to make we tell you anything other than CLOSE MY ACCOUNT.” So finally we get the account closed.

End of story right… not really…

Yesterday I got the confirmation letter from nameless three letter credit card providing company that they had indeed closed my account. Today I got a letter from nameless three letter credit card providing company telling me that they have RAISED THE CASH ADVANCE LIMIT ON MY ACCOUNT!!!! Oh and here’s some CHECKS so you can get cash and pay it off plus 23% interest on that cash too!

Not that I was going to get rid of it - but I think I’m going to want to make sure I keep that letter confirming that the account has been closed ….

So The Boy has been working a Dirty Jobs addiction for about a year now. All things considered, I guess it’s not too bad a show for a 4 year old to be interested in. For some reason The Boy has really latched on to the “Leather Tanner” episode from July 17 which featured a visit with a guy who makes pots with faces on them, and a visit to a Leather Tannery. The tannery segment takes viewers through the process of tanning hides, from removing flesh from the hide all the way through to wringing them out and then “staking” to soften them up, to measuring.

Anyway the other night we’re sitting at dinner and The Boy is dazzling us with his new found letter recognition skills-

The Wife- What letter does dog start with?

The Boy- Letter D

TW- What letter does Joe start with?

TB- Letter J

Me (puffing up with pride along with The Wife) What letter does cat start with?

TB- Letter C

TW (pride welling up inside) What letter does chair start with?

TB- Letter C… (pause) … Staking Machine starts with Letter S.

TW- Wha?

Me- (Partly amused, still somewhat impressed) Um yes buddy, Staking Machine starts with the letter S.

TB- (with authority) De-fleshing machine start with Letter D.

TW- (now seeing where this is going) uhh yeah buddy it starts with d?

TB- (all serious like) Mamma, what letter does disemboweler start with?

Me- (trying not to spit my dinner across the table) …..

TB- Staking machine is my favorite!

Now before anybody really flips out, there is no disemboweler in the episode… It was a joke, of course the fact that The Boy picked up on it, well that’s another thing….

BTW, I’m putting the finishing touches on my acceptance speech for Dad of The Year in case you were wondering…